Child Self Esteem
How to raise Self Esteem

Selfless Service builds Child Self Esteem, continued

Youth will thrive on opportunities to give meaningful service.

We should not be afraid to ask our youth to render service to their fellowmen or to sacrifice for the kingdom. Our youth have a sense of intrinsic idealism, and we need have no fear in appealing to that idealism when we call them to serve.15

As we read of delinquency and crime, … and as we note many are committed by girls and boys, we ask ourselves what is the cause and what are the cures? In an adequate survey it was learned that a majority of youth wish responsibility and will thrive on it.

“What can we do?” [the youth] ask. …

Do the shopping, work in the hospital, help the neighbors … , wash dishes, vacuum the floors, make the beds, get the meals, learn to sew.

Read good books, repair the furniture, make something needed in the home, clean the house, press your clothes, rake the leaves, shovel the snow.16

We are concerned … with our need to provide continually significant opportunities for our young men to stretch their souls in service. Young men do not usually become inactive in the Church because they are given too many significant things to do. No young man who has really witnessed for himself that the gospel works in the lives of the people will walk away from his duties in the kingdom and leave them undone.17

I hope our young women of the Church will establish early in their lives a habit of Christian service. When we help other people with their problems, it puts ours in fresh perspective. We encourage the sisters of the Church—young and older—to be “anxiously engaged” [D&C 58:27] in quiet acts of service for friends and neighbors. Every principle of the gospel carries within itself its own witness that it is true. So it is that acts of service help not only the beneficiaries of the service, but they enlarge the giver.18
Giving selfless service leads us to the abundant life.

Service to others deepens and sweetens this life while we are preparing to live in a better world. It is by serving that we learn how to serve. When we are engaged in the service of our fellowmen, not only do our deeds assist them, but we put our own problems in a fresher perspective. When we concern ourselves more with others, there is less time to be concerned with ourselves! In the midst of the miracle of serving, there is the promise of Jesus that by losing ourselves, we find ourselves! [See Matthew 10:39.]

Not only do we “find” ourselves in terms of acknowledging divine guidance in our lives, but the more we serve our fellowmen in appropriate ways, the more substance there is to our souls. We become more significant individuals as we serve others. We become more substantive as we serve others—indeed, it is easier to “find” ourselves because there is so much more of us to find!

… The abundant life noted in the scriptures [see John 10:10] is the spiritual sum that is arrived at by the multiplying of our service to others and by investing our talents in service to God and to man. Jesus said, you will recall, that on the first two commandments hang all the law and the prophets, and those two commandments involve developing our love of God, of self, of our neighbors, and of all men [see Matthew 22:36–40]. There can be no real abundance in life that is not connected with the keeping and the carrying out of those two great commandments.

Unless the way we live draws us closer to our Heavenly Father and to our fellowmen, there will be an enormous emptiness in our lives. It is frightening for me to see, for instance, how the life-style of so many today causes them to disengage from their families and their friends and their peers toward a heedless pursuit of pleasure or materialism. So often loyalty to family, to community, and to country is pushed aside in favor of other pursuits which are wrongly thought to be productive of happiness when, in fact, selfishness is so often the pursuit of questionable pleasure which passes so quickly. One of the differences between true joy and mere pleasure is that certain pleasures are realized only at the cost of someone else’s pain. Joy, on the other hand, springs out of selflessness and service, and it benefits rather than hurts others.19

I know a man whose every thought through three quarters of a century had been for and of himself. … He had sought to keep his life for himself, and to gather all the good things of life for his own development and enjoyment. Strangely enough, trying to keep his life for himself, … he has shrunk, has lost his friends, and his own people shun him as a bore.

And now, as life is ebbing out gradually, he finds himself standing alone, forsaken, bitter, unloved, and unsung; and with self-pity, he can still think of only one person, himself. He has sought to save for himself his time, talents, and his means. He has lost the abundant life.

On the other hand, I know another man who has never given thought to himself. His every desire was for the protection and pleasure of those about him. No task was too great, no sacrifice too much for him to make for his fellowmen. His means brought relief from physical suffering; his kind work and thoughtfulness brought comfort and cheer and courage. Wherever people were in distress, he was on hand, cheering the discouraged, burying the dead, comforting the bereaved, and proving himself a friend in need. His time, his means, and his energies were lavished upon those needing assistance. Having given himself freely, by that same act he has added to his mental, physical, and moral stature until today he stands in his declining years a power for good, an example and an inspiration to many. He has developed and grown until he is everywhere acclaimed, loved, and appreciated. He has given life and in a real way has truly found the abundant life.20

As the contrasts between the ways of the world and the ways of God become sharpened by circumstance, the faith of the members of the Church will be tried even more severely. One of the most vital things we can do is to express our testimonies through service, which will, in turn, produce spiritual growth, greater commitment, and a greater capacity to keep the commandments. …

There is great security in spirituality, and we cannot have spirituality without service!21

If we seek true happiness, we must expend our energies for purposes larger than our own self-interests. Let us ponder prayerfully how we may effectively and lovingly give service to our families, neighbors, and fellow Saints.22
Suggestions for Study and Teaching

Consider these ideas as you study the chapter or as you prepare to teach.

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• Consider the effects of President Kimball’s simple act of kindness. What can we learn from the manner in which he provided the service?
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• How would you describe the way in which the Savior served others? (See part one) What can we do to follow His example?
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•  When has God met your needs through other people? What can we do to be ready to meet the needs of others?
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• See parable of barren fig tree, looking for obstacles that can hinder us from giving selfless service. How can we overcome these obstacles?
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• President Kimball taught that youth need opportunities to serve  Why is this so? What can parents and Church leaders do to provide youth with significant opportunities to serve?
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• What do you think it means to have “the abundant life”?  Why does selfless service lead to the abundant life?

Related Scriptures:Matthew 25:40; James 1:27; Mosiah 2:17; 4:14–16; D&C 88:123

 See also  Abundant life
Notes

1. See “Small Acts of Service,” Ensign, Dec. 1974, 7.

2. Edward L. Kimball and Andrew E. Kimball Jr., Spencer W. Kimball (1977), 334.

3. In Gordon B. Hinckley, “Do Ye Even So to Them,” Ensign, Dec. 1991, 5.

4. Regional representatives’ seminar, Mar. 30, 1979, Archives of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 3.

5. ”Jesus: The Perfect Leader,” Ensign, Aug. 1979, 6.

6. ”The Abundant Life,” Ensign, July 1978, 7.

7. Ensign, July 1978, 5–6.

8. Ensign, Dec. 1974, 4, 5, 7.

9. In Conference Report, Apr. 1976, 71; or Ensign, May 1976, 47.

10. The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, ed. Edward L. Kimball (1982), 257.

11. ”How to Evaluate Your Performance,” Improvement Era, Oct. 1969, 16.

12. The Miracle of Forgiveness (1969), 100.

13. ”President Kimball Speaks Out on Service to Others,” New Era, Mar. 1981, 49.

14. Ensign, July 1978, 4, 5.

15. ”President Kimball Speaks Out on Being a Missionary,” New Era, May 1981, 48.

16. In Conference Report, Oct. 1963, 38–39; or Improvement Era, Dec. 1963, 1073.

17. In Conference Report, Apr. 1976, 68–69; or Ensign, May 1976, 45.

18. ”Privileges and Responsibilities of Sisters,” Ensign, Nov. 1978, 104.

19. Ensign, July 1978, 3, 4.

20. The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, 250–51.

21. Ensign, Dec. 1974, 5.

22. ”Seek Learning, Even by Study and Also by Faith,” Ensign, Sept. 1983, 6.