Modesty Matters: Families Talk about Modest Dress

“Modesty Matters,” Ensign, June 2006, 22

Dressing modestly is a challenge in today’s world. Here, Church members share their responses to the following questions: How do you ensure that your clothing is modest? How have you promoted modesty in your family, ward, or stake (or branch or district)? What insights have you gained about the importance of modesty?

Who Did I Want to Be?

An event some years ago changed my attitude toward modesty. As I got ready to go to a Mutual activity, I put on some short shorts; it never occurred to me that they were inappropriate. The activities planned for that Tuesday included having the missionaries give us some practical advice about missionary work. One of the last empty seats was next to me. For a brief moment the elders began to argue, as discreetly as they could, over who had to sit next to me. Though they never said so specifically, I understood they were uneasy because of the way I was dressed.

At that moment, notwithstanding my embarrassment, I began to understand what it meant to be modest. I realized that I was making virtuous young men feel uncomfortable—and that I could also be making unvirtuous men feel too comfortable. I began to better understand what type of person I wanted to be with and, more important, what type of person I wanted to be. From that moment on, I was not only prepared for the changes I was about to make, but I looked forward to making them.

~Chelsea Anderson, Ohio

A Modesty Fashion Show

In October 2004 the Young Women and Young Men organizations in our stake had an event called “Modesty in Dress,” based on the pamphlet For the Strength of Youth. It consisted of a fashion show divided into three parts: casual wear, sportswear, and formal wear. We asked each of the young men and young women to select three changes of clothing, and we helped them choose which clothes were suitable. We invited their leaders and parents to this activity. We emphasized scriptural verses about the body being a temple (see 1 Cor. 6:19–20) and the counsel of our prophet, President Gordon B. Hinckley. The activity had a positive effect; the young people in our stake are more concerned now about grooming and dressing in an appropriate way.

~Teresa de Jesús Contreras de Ramírez, Mexico

Modesty Tips

Modesty is definitely a challenge in today’s world, especially for teenage girls. I know—I am one. But you can be modest all the time and still wear what’s in style. Here are some tips I have found helpful:

• Buy several long tank tops in different colors that you can tuck into your pants so your tummy won’t show with a shorter shirt.

• Sew a strip of fabric onto the bottom of shorter shirts.

• If a shirt is mostly cotton, buy a size larger than you normally would so when you wash it, it won’t be too tight or too short.

• Buy long boy’s shorts when they are available during the summer.

• If the top part of a dress is immodest, consider cutting off the top and altering the dress to make a fancy skirt; then find a nice top to match.

• Start shopping early for the prom and other special events so you won’t be tempted to buy something immodest at the last minute.

A lot of girls give up on being modest because they think it is just too hard. But I can tell you that it can be done!


~Jami Elsmore, Nevada

A Daily Reminder

I have a picture of the Savior and a picture of the London England Temple in my wardrobe. When I open it to get my clothes, I am always reminded to keep myself clean and modest so that I can one day go to the temple and worship there.

~Carolyn Bailey, England

Tight Fit Is Also Immodest

Many people think immodest dress relates only to an insufficiently covered body. But a tight fit is also immodest, even when the body is fully covered. This applies to men as well as women. Many do not realize that tight clothing draws attention to the anatomy, which distracts from the purpose of education, business, leadership, or worship. Adequate ease in the fit of our clothes allows the viewer’s attention to go to the other person’s face for more effective communication.

~Judith Rasband, Utah

The Body Is a Temple

Bahia, Brazil, where I live, has a very hot climate, which makes it a little hard for people to dress modestly. But I feel something special when I dress in a way that invites the Spirit to be with me. I know that the body is a temple of God and that it should be treated with respect.

~Stephan Cerqueira Levita, Brazil

A Matter of Prayer

After a discouraging day of prom-dress shopping with two of my daughters, we returned home in weary tears. We had not found one modest dress. I encouraged my daughters to take their desires to the Lord in prayer. They looked at me quizzically, not at all certain that a wardrobe concern was prayer-worthy. I promised them that Nephi’s conviction in 1 Nephi 3:7 [1 Ne. 3:7] applies to the mundane as well as the monumental: “I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them.” My daughters agreed to pray about the problem, and within a week we found beautiful dresses in unexpected places that we could alter to be perfectly appropriate.

We continue to make modesty a matter of prayer. I have learned to follow small promptings from the Spirit, even if it means driving a distance, searching through sample racks, or making substantial alterations. I want my daughters to know that I value modesty enough to go out of my way.

~Jerie Jacobs, California

Protection against Temptation, and other testimonies about Modesty, continued